If you there, please listen. I don�t speak as well as I do with writing so I hope this letter to you means something. Although, I do know I am some insignificant human being, just please listen to me.
Many things have been happening lately. Countless feelings have been bottled up inside me and I need to get them out.
I feel ignored this year. Last year, and I know I shouldn�t be living in the past but I cannot help it, I was partially the center of attention. I guess I never really was wanted back then either.
Realizations hit you at the worst times, you know.
I am jealous of everyone and everybody. Everyone else gets a piece of the cookie, while I am just left with the crumbs. Everyone else either has a boyfriend or a best friend, while I have no one to talk to or open up too, and when I do, I don�t completely trust the person.
I know everything will work out, I am just in such a state where every time I get ignored or someone leaves me behind, I just want to hide away in the corner and cry.
I hate seeing myself like this and I hate the fact that I am. I try so hard to be happy, and I really am. I always live in the moment, and just go for it.
But when the moment is over�I�m left being melancholy again.
I realize that life is just like a game. It�s not always fair or easy, but in the end, you have to be a good sportsman whether you win or lose. I know I have to deal with the cards I was dealt, but I just need a sign for which way to go. Do I just forget everyone and go on my own, or do I still try to be the old me again?
I just need someone. I don�t care who, just somebody who can physically stand in front of me and give me advice on what to do. I don�t want to go back to that state of depression. I don�t want to start taking those pills. I don�t want to start the starvation deal again. I don�t want any of that. And I will make a promise to you that I will never do any of that again. No matter how often the thought crosses my mind�
But my hope is starting to falter, and I need your guidance because I don�t know which path to take. I�m caught between the fork in the road and I don�t know whether to go left or right�
Or just stay perplexed in the middle of both�undecided on what to do. But either way, I will make sure that everyone else is happy. Because if everyone else is happy, I will at least feel good that they aren't where I am. Yes. I promise you that.
Sincerely,
Danielley
� Danielley
